I really don't know why . Part Onee .

I cannot get over him no matter what I do .
I have given so much thought into this one being .
I examine every fine piece of his clothing .
The way his eyes smile before he laughs ,
The way his hands have a natural chubbyness to them .
and how his mouth is so inviting .

The way he smells ,
It is like a roller coaster flying in mid-air slow motion .
I get a fluttering feeling in my chest like I'm about to faint .
We don't even have the many days of school left .
And I'm thinking about all the days I spent pretending like I
didn't give a damn about you . Because my pride is too big for my little body ,.
And all those days he spent trying to forget he ever met me .
Or even knew my name .
And I tried to move on and find someone else .
But It never worked ,
because I would fall right back to him .
It looked like I didn't give a damn
When I actually care a whole lot than it seemed .
And he's gonna go on and meet girls who catch his interest .
And I'm going to be right here .
Waiting for him to come back to me .
Waiting for something to take me away fro everything that takes the
glow from my eyes .

I remember the first time I saw him ,
And I saw sparks .
I still see sparks .
I don't know if I've fell in love or not .
Because They always say I don't know what love is .
And I cry about it .
Because I am alone and confiused .
Wish he could step into my heart and see how so beautiful everything is .
And how badly I'm going to miss him .
And how I'm going to cry about it .
And how I'm going to go outside in the middle of the night and sit there crying .
Thinking about every opportunity I had to tell him how much I loved him .
And how I am just realizing it .
And how it too late .

But I know somewhere,
deep inside the both of us ,
there is a destiny .

You can call me crazy , or read this and laugh .
I really don't care .
And as much as I hate talking about my feelings ,
I couldn't help but write this .
And as I cry thinking about how much I'm going to miss him .
And on the last day of school , I will sob my ass right out of
Stephen F. Austin .
I can see it now .
And right before he leaves ,
I'm going to run to him, and tell him how much I love him .
And how i was so stupid because I let all this time go by
and I didn't say a damn word .

It can go either two ways :
He can understand and see something in me that he has never seen before .
He can look deep into my soul and see the deep passion behind these brown eyes and
we can make something of this, and turn this back into a real relationship .
And make it work .
Not just a little oh we go out .
No , a relationship where both people benifit and go on
solving problems and saving the day .


Or he can not see it .
And walk out of my life and forget he ever knew Gene'a Evonna .
And I can be heartbroken and feeling a void in my soul .
And I won't ever be the same .

We will see how this goes .
I never know what tommorow brings .
<3
To Be Continued . . .